Courtesy: Jewish Chronicle


GB Masters get bronze in Spain

06/05/2008

By Jeremy Silverstone

Maccabi GB had the good sense of appointing the Special One as the new managerial talent for the Masters Futsal GB team. If you haven’t guessed yet, I am of course talking about Daniel Collins, boss of an impressive team of 40-year-old's of every shape and size.

What a weekend! When the Galacticos from Great Britain humbled our European neighbours. The Futsal team finished in fine style bringing home the bronze with resounding victories over Portugal and Russia and marginally losing to Germany and the eventual champions and hosts Spain.

The fans streamed out of the stadium Polideportivo de Alcobendas at the end of this exquisite tournament with two questions on their lips: Would Daniel Collins be poached by Roman Abramovich in the summer transfer window? And, will any of this squad be representing GB at the Maccabiah Games in the land of milk and honey come summer 2009?

The answer to the first question is definitely ‘no’, at least not now, whilst Chelsea still chooses to play games on Shabbat and Yom Tov. As for the second question, the answer must be ‘no’ as well as was clearly pointed out on several instances during the many motivational talks to the squad from our chairman Stuart Lustigman.

The matches all went well, with some lovely passing and solid defending in front of the towering presence of Gary “HC” Brunen in goal. The boys scored an impressive goal against Germany with some neat footwork from the impressive half Portuguese, half Nigerian Eric Elbaz before setting up Mark “hightower” Herman to slot in a precise finish past the big German keeper, John “Babe” Cohen came close on several occasions but was mysteriously stopped in his tracks by a freak attack of pig fever, nonetheless the magic sponge worked its wonders and he was back to full pelt for the remaining matches. The game against Portugal proved to be the match of the tournament with a brace from player manager Daniel “Buffon” Collins and a well worked set-piece involving Andrew “anti-viral” Lipton, with David “oz cabs airport jobby” Hyman finding the back of the net. With the scores level and minutes to go along came Scott “am I red yet” Ansher to slam in the winner. The joy was immense as was the lunch which followed. With too much humous consumed by all, a communal shluff was ordered by the gaffer.

The games were all played in a very good spirit and were generally free of incident. There were no bookings, sendings-off (except for Hymie), headbutts, (except for all the Spanish) stamping or diving (except from Jony Cohen) incidents, broken metatarsals or racist taunts (FIFA could learn a lot from this tournament.)

‘Daniel Collins was ecstatic with his squad, waxing lyrical about his stars in between mouthfuls of the obligatory post-match shwarma: “I am a proud man tonight. There were some big performances out there and I feel we have sent a strong message out to the whole of Europe. There must be some pretty terrified teams out there. But I say to them tonight – keep your hands off my players, they are not going to Tongo.”

GB squad: Gary Brunen, Andrew Lipton, Daniel Collins, Mark Herman, Scott Ansher, David Hyman, Jonathon Cohen, Eric Elbaz




Posted by Luca Ranocchiari --> luca.ranocchiari@futsalplanet.com